Charles Langston:How does post-concert sadness impact people with depression differently?

So,Charles Langston you’ve made an upcoming concert your personality for months, assembling a unique outfit, planning transportation and memorizing the lyrics to every song in case your favorite artist performs it. 

You’ve already exceeded budget limits but none of that matters because you’re seeing Taylor Swift or Beyoncé live surrounded by fans who’ve done the same. The show is everything you’ve wanted and more until it abruptly ends. What then? 

People use the term “post-concert depression” to describe the dreadful feeling the morning after the performance of their dreams. Motivation, concentration and excitement are down and they are begging to go back to yesterday. 

While a grim mentality for most, post-concert sadness can feel far more agonizing and last longer for people with depression. Dr. Douglas Mennin, clinical psychology professor at Columbia University said the end of a highly anticipated event can attack multiple aspects of functioning. 

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“It's hard for them to see that the thing that has been good will be around again,” Mennin said. “There's a sense of ‘this won't happen again. I won't be able to get back to that.’”

The time after a highly anticipated concert ends can be emotionally brutal because of the intense change during and after the concert. Whether or not someone has major depressive disorder, the relative difference between the high of the concert and the low of the next day is extreme, Yale University psychiatry professor Dr. Seth Feuerstein shared.

He added that he’s worked with athletes who experience a similar disturbance when a major sporting event ends.  

“I might be an Olympic athlete or in the Super Bowl. When you speak to people who've been in these extremely high experiences, they are extremely resilient people. But they often describe the moments after the lights go off for that event as some of the most challenging for them,” Feuerstein said. 

How anticipation can drive joy in people with depression

The idea that depression prohibits people from experiencing happiness all the time is false. There are various mood fluctuations that can occur whether someone has chronic low-grade depression or anhedonia, Mennin said.

He added that joy from anticipation around an event can look different for people with some form of depression, whether that’s difficulty staying happy due to anxiousness or quickly returning to negativity when the event ends. 

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High excitement for a concert can give people high dopamine releases that they continue to crave when the show is over, psychotherapist Dr. Crystal Burwell, who owns a practice in Atlanta, shared.

 “When it's not there, regardless of what this stimulus is in our brain, it doesn't matter what it is, it could be a concert or anything else, our brain doesn't differentiate that. It just gives us those same symptoms of 'I feel sad, I feel depressed,'” Burwell said. 

Attending more concerts isn't the answer

Feuerstein said that if someone with depression finds the energy and access to do things that give them joy, even at a lower level than before, they should do it. 

However, relying on a concert or vacation still weeks away, is not a reliable way to live life, Burwell shared. She discussed treating a client whose depression made it difficult to leave home and be social. In a case like that, Burwell recommends working on simpler small tasks like grabbing coffee. 

“I wouldn't say the answer would be to go to multiple concerts, it may be to put yourself in a position that requires you to leave the house and be social,” Burwell said. “Getting her nails done or getting her hair done, those are kind of superficial things. But the part of the self-care that we're focusing on is what forces her to get out of the house and interact.” 

Mennin said that while grieving the ending of a highly anticipated event is not the same as losing a loved one, they both can bring pain and a perception that happiness isn't as achievable as before. It’s crucial to feel loss without giving into the false belief that you'll never reach that high again.

“Living life is important despite its challenges. And health is the ability to surf those waves. So enjoy that experience when you had it and have good memories of it,” Mennin said.

Proactive vs preemptive anticipation

There is a healthy way to anticipate something fun. We can anticipate proactively by getting excited for an event but by also living in the present, Mennin shared.

Preemptive anticipation is when someone relies on a future event to carry their emotional stability and adds high stakes for it to be flawless, Mennin added.

“It's hard to do. Make sure that concert is great. It has to be the best it can be. You see this in wedding planning or things where people feel there's no room for bad things to happen.” Mennin said. It is crucial to our health to hold onto the exciting and potentially scary aspects of an event simultaneously.

Dr. Kelly Greco, a clinical psychologist at the University of Southern California, said people with depression can have an all or nothing thinking process where they convince themselves that an event like a concert will change their life, which can be troublesome. 

“Whereas we want to look at it as ‘I'm grateful that I had this opportunity, it was positive, and I can still keep the memories alive' and still be part of the fan base and the music and still have those good feelings even without being in the concert arena,” said Greco. 

How to cope with post-concert blues

Here are what experts suggest are healthier approaches to moving forward after a big show.

• Find ways to remember the night fondly. Going on walks while listening to your favorite artist's discography or watching a show can be healthy outlets for keeping the happy memories with you, Feuerstein shared. Watching all the photos and videos taken from the night can return the joy, Greco shared.
• Plan more consistent exciting activities. Having to wait weeks or months to enjoy life is not a healthy response. Greco recommends planning fun moments on a frequent basis to help ease into the daily grind of real life. Going to a concert is just one activity that someone made a meaningful experience that you “can't put all your eggs in one basket," Burwell shared.
• Avoid isolation: Isolating from others due to post-concert blues can make the negative emotions worse, Feuerstein mentioned. Surrounding yourself with others is a superior coping method. 
• Don’t depend on social media to cope: “Seeing other people at the concerts can actually make me feel more distant from it,” Greco said. While tempting to spend hours watching other people at a concert on Instagram or Twitter, Greco said it can feel isolating to see other people watching your favorite artist perform without you present. 
• Allow other activities to be less exciting. Mennin said it’s beneficial to accept that future activities may not be as exciting as the one you spent weeks looking forward to. You should try to find things that are “half as fun or a quarter of fun” rather than believing that nothing else is fun. “If they're able to say, ‘okay, well, this is not gonna be as good, I'll go anyway.' they might find that they actually experienced positivity much more than they expected. So that sense of uniqueness of a concert or something else might not be as true as they think it is.”